Geylang

So yesterday Fiona, Peiling, Nic and me went to Geylang! We were really excited, especially me and Nic cuz we've never been there before, and we wanted to see how things worked and also have a look at the hookers. So after helping my tuition teacher mark her papers for like 6 hours, I felt really crappy cuz my ass hurt after sitting down for so long and all those primary sch kids so noisy and almost gave me a headache. Then I rushed off to CCK interchange to meet Nic and the girls.

Walao the bus ride was like 45min-ish. We took 985, and Geylang was the last stop. I think the bus ride seemed so long that Nic almost puked on me. One way to spot the chi ko peks is to see who remains on the bus all the way. When we reached Geylang, the only people left on the bus was us and like 2 other guys, heehee!

So we left the interchange, and entered Geylang! I think we were at Lorong 13 first.

So we took a few pictures...

We were at the perimeter of Geylang, so that section still quite okay, cuz all the hookers are like in the inner depths of Geylang. That's where all the fun happens.. hurhur! So we walked along the outer street first, got like one full row consisting entirely of steamboat restaurants! And the food there all looked super good lah. And then also got a lot of massage parlours. If you look at the posters, you will see the massage lady massaging some random guy in various positions. Then if you look inside the shop... you will see the same massage lady! So you really get what you see from the posters... heh.

So we continued walking... then we saw this:

Heh, we were really amused by this, like this was the first hotel we saw, then already called Gay World Hotel. Shouldn't this be in like Changi or something? But I think it's only called Gay World Hotel cuz it's a direct translation from the Chinese name... I doubt it's really a Gay hotel... Or is it? Heehee! We later found out that this hotel is actually on the MRT directory map! Haha! Like some landmark or something la. It's the ONLY hotel out of the dozens and dozens of hotels in Geylang on the MRT directory map!

So we went deeper into Geylang, and omg it was so interesting! First you see like 1 or 2 hookers along the road, then as you walk deeper and deeper in, you suddenly see like one whole stretch of road with like a dozen hookers all lined up! Hurhur! Then of course got all those chi ko peks all walking around and stuff.

Pei Ling was like really brave to wear this bare-shouldered red dress to Geylang, haha! We were walking past this coffee shop in the below pic:

Then me and Nic were walking behind Peiling and Fiona. So when the girls walked past the coffee shop, me and Nic saw like at least 70% of the heads turn to look at the girls! HAHA me and Nic were greatly amused! Some more the coffee shop, is like almost all the customers there are old men!


We continued walking, then we reached this stretch of pavement beside a road, then omg got like tons of hookers all leaning against the fence, waiting for all those chi ko peks to come and pick them. Then as we were walking past, we overheard this China guy approach this really pretty China prostitute. The guy asked her (in mandarin) one hour how much, then she said $60/hour. Wah seh!! A lot of money loh like that. I calculated, if you one hour $60, then let's say you work 5 hours a day, you earn $300 a day! If you work 10 days a month, 5 hours each, you can earn like $3,000 a month! Wah be hooker not bad loh, really!

After we passed that road, we came to this traffic junction. Then before the traffic junction we noticed got like this huge crowd gathering around this empty spot. So we went to look, then saw this fat lady singing hokkien or cantonese songs. For some reason all the chi ko peks were entertained by her lousy singing. So Fiona took a picture or something, then as we were walking off, suddenly this China uncle go and stand in front of Fiona then ask for donation. He said something like "Pai zhao liao yao gei qian" (take picture already must donate). I think the China uncle and the fat lady singing hokkien songs both teamwork one. One sings then the other collect money. So anyway, when Fiona refused and tried to walk away, the China guy go and grab Fiona's hand! Nicholas was behind saying like "Faster walk! Faster walk!". Then luckily the traffic light turned green so we faster walked ahead. After that incident, Fiona was like "Eeee that uncle molest my hand loh!". Heehee! Fiona, later your hand got AIDS or something I won't be surprised! Ohohoho!

This is the chi ko pek!

So after that we got hungry then decided to go and have our dinner at this coffee shop.

The food wasn't bad, Peiling reccomended their carrot cake, which I thought was quite different from the rest. I think they used white turnip or something, so the carrot cake was quite fat. Me and Nic tried their Mee Sua or something, then when it came I was quite grossed out, cuz it looked like a really bad case of diarrhoea. But turned out it tasted quite good. Oh then as we were eating this couple came and sat at a table across of ours. This ang moh guy and this fat chinese lady. Then Nic commented that the chinese lady's boobs were bigger than the ang moh guy's head, I turned to look and omg it was true! Like titanic boobs la!

So after our meal we continued the excursion! I noticed that they have a lot of internet cafes, heehee! I think if you go into the cafe, then look at the internet history, probably all full of porn or something. Then also we walked past a few sex toy shops, most of them need to be at least 21 to enter, but got one 18 can already but Nic not 18 yet so cannot loh, pfft!

I also noticed there were an usually high number of religious buildings in Geylang, especially temples. I think in our trip there we walked past like 10 temples or more. I seriously suspect that those temples are actually like brothels or something loh! Cuz like outside the temples can see hookers standing there also. Then I saw this Chinese guy approach this small temple, then got one ah pek sitting outside the temple. Then when the Chinese guy approached the entrance, the ah pek waved his hand and shook his head, as if saying "no". So I think the Chinese guy wanted to have some hanky panky but the ah pek's hookers all probably done for the night or something. Heehee!

A picture of 2 hookers in the background! Most of them just stand around and wait for uncles to come and approach them. All of them wear like super short mini skirts or anything similar to that, hehe!

So we continued walking, until we reached this roadside place. We were just walking along, then suddenly this Filipino hooker jumped in front of me and grabbed my arm! She said something but I couldn't make it out, I was really shocked but I tried to walk away. But then as I tried to walk away, she go and jump in front of me again, then made moaning noises! Like "Ahhh...! Mmmmmnnggg...!" and was like gyrating her boobies in front of me. I think I just stoned there for like a good 3 seconds just staring at her with my mouth open. LUCKILY Fiona came and saved me. She grabbed my hand and like pulled me away, and told the prostitute "SORRY HE'S MINE!" HAHAHA omg lucky Fiona saved me if not later I lose my virginity to that hooker then next morning wake up with like 5 STDS or something.

So after that incident, we decided to have a competition between me and Nic, to see who would get the most hookers. I scored one point off that boobie gyrating hooker, and Nic still at 0 points! Heehee!

We continued exploring Geylang, and encountered a lot of other amusing things, like we saw this tranny hooker who was like super tall, taller than me, then the biceps like super big, and also when we walked past this group of hookers, they all were like "Wah! Hamsum siioooll!".


Then it was like about 10.30pm already, so we decided to leave. Then as we were walking along this row of shops, suddenly this group of like 3 or 4 Chinese girls attacked us! Because Nic was walking in front, 2 of them go and like grab his arm, then one of them grabbed mine. They were saying something like "Hello xian sheeeennggg!" (Hello misteeeeeeer!), then we tried to walk off but couldn't cuz they were like pulling our arms. THEN AGAIN luckily Fiona come and save us! She gave a mighty tug, and pulled us away! As we walked off we could hear those China hookers apologizing, they were saying like "Dui bu qi ah! Dui bu qi ah!" (Sorry ah! Sorry ah!) But then they all really not bad loh, very pretty and busty too! So after that incident, + 1 point to me and +1 point to Nic.

We finally made our way out of Geylang, (unharmed, thankfully, but not untouched) and the winner of the day was me! Hohoho! I beat you, Nic! 2 points to one! Hurhurhur!

All in all, I would say it was a really interesting experience! I would definitely visit Geylang again! Heehee! Bye everyone!



xoxo, Jit